


Like Something Holy

by softwinds



Category: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
Genre: (very slightly), Body Worship, Feelings, Fluff, M/M, Post-Season/Series 02, Self-Esteem Issues, Shameless Smut, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, and I mean it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:33:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25368427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softwinds/pseuds/softwinds
Summary: “The hell are you talking about, littleCaesar? The Palaiolo-something-guy had nothing on you!” Nandor frowns in disbelief. “He had the worst mustache I have ever seen! Don’t trust the drawings—painters lied, Guillermo, they were very dishonest people back then.”“What I mean is,” Guillermo turns to him, face looking more serious than before, “I know what I have. I know how I look, and I’m at peace with it. I’ve passed the point where I need constant approval from other people. I’m happy that you want to compliment me, but I won’t pretend to actually believe in that sort of stuff.”-Prompt: Guillermo fat positive body worship. Nandor ravishing Guillermo and enjoying every moment of it.
Relationships: Guillermo de la Cruz/Nandor the Relentless
Comments: 17
Kudos: 195





	Like Something Holy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [walkwithursus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/walkwithursus/gifts).



> Prompt fill! Set after S2.  
> Beta by [walkwithursus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/walkwithursus) and [Pups_Side_Box](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Puppyinabox). Thank you so much!!!  
> tw self esteem issues (very mild, not really getting into it deep here). lots of fluff and smut :>

“You are breath-taking, Guillermo.” Nandor leans against the door frame, watching as his human prances around their library room, looking for a day-time read that catches his interest. “If I were still a human and still had my breath, you would have taken it away from me.”

“Huh?” Guillermo turns to him and raises his eyebrows. “That’s very flattering, Nandor. You mean I could have killed you?”

“ _See?_ You are making fun of me again.” Nandor pulls a disappointed face and whines dramatically, “You know what I mean! I am saying that you are very beautiful. You are the best-looking human person I have ever seen, Guillermo.”

“Sure, whatever you say,” Guillermo replies nonchalantly, pulling out a tome from their large bookshelf. “None of these books are cursed, right? I tried one out last week and got attacked by a squirrel right after.”

“Fuck the squirrel—what do you mean, _whatever you say?_ ” Nandor steadies himself onto his feet and settles his hands on either side of his hips. There is an edge to Guillermo’s tone that he doesn’t feel good about. “You don’t believe me? That is very insulting! When did I ever lie to you?”

“First of all, you promised to—”

“You need to let go of the past, Guillermo,” Nandor interrupts him, “Do not try to change topic. You know that you are very beautiful, right?”

“Well,” Guillermo laughs quietly, following a defeated sigh, “I’m okay. Fine, I guess. Five out of ten. Maybe better than Little Caesars, probably worse than Papa Johns.”

“The hell are you talking about, little _Caesar_? The Palaiolo-something-guy had nothing on you!” Nandor frowns in disbelief. “He had the worst mustache I have ever seen! Don’t trust the drawings— painters lied, Guillermo, they were very dishonest people back then.”

“What I mean is,” Guillermo turns to him, face looking more serious than before, “I know what I have. I know how I look, and I’m at peace with it. I’ve passed the point where I need constant approval from other people. I’m happy that you want to compliment me, but I won’t pretend to actually believe in that sort of stuff.”

“That was the stupidest thing I have heard all day, and Colin Robinson told me about _face-booked farms_ this evening.” Nandor flinches. Shaking his head, Nandor tries to digest the fact that Guillermo— his strong, gorgeous, mouth-watering Guillermo, of all people— doesn’t see himself as the stunner he is. “Ahhh, I see. You are doing a bit! Like a practical joke! Very funny, ha-ha, almost got me. Don’t do that again.”

“I’m not?” Guillermo shrugs. “Can we skip this conversation, please? For sure you have better things to do.”

“That is quite rude of you, Guillermo. I was having a nice time watching you.” Nandor feels a bit betrayed. Guillermo just told him to mind his own business, even though it is clearly within his responsibility to investigate his human’s silly thought. “I shall tend to my 4 a.m. business in the coffin room now. You may still come and talk with me if you want to say sorry.”

-

Nandor is still thinking about yesterday’s event when he pushes Guillermo into their sheets, the latter moaning and whimpering and tugging him closer, yielding under his touch. He licks down the side of Guillermo’s neck and rocks his hips forward, feeling the hands on his shoulders clutching tighter.

“How pretty,” he nips at Guillermo’s soft, exposed skin, hoping to plant down one or two hickeys for tomorrow. “How flawless you are. My perfect little beast, such an eyeful... Do you know that, Guillermo?”

“Yes, of course,” Guillermo tugs at Nandor’s shirt, setting his fingers eagerly upon his bare chest. Nandor growls and slides his palms into the hem of Guillermo’s sweater, digging into the warm flesh underneath.

“Describe to me then,” Nandor mutters against his human’s ear. “Tell me how beautiful you are.”

“Uhm,” Guillermo freezes for a second, hands stopping on the small of Nandor’s back. “Do we have to do it now?”

“Yes, Guillermo, I want to hear it.”

“I’m… fine to look at?” Guillermo replies, barely veiling his reluctance. “I have nice hair?”

“Continue…” Nandor kisses the joint between his neck and shoulder. “More, my good Guillermo, tell me everything.”

“My nose is kind of cute? Someone told me that once. My skin is o-kay, uh, if you squint and ignore the rosacea…” He trails off, as if he cannot find anything else to say.

“Guillermo!” Nandor breaks himself apart from his human’s welcoming body. “I will have none of this! I cannot believe it!”

“What are you talking about?”

“Do you not know that I desire you?”

“I’ve noticed it. You have made it loud and clear by storming into my room every other night.” Guillermo sits up a little, flushed and disorientated. “What’s the matter anyway?”

“Do you question my judgement in human beauty, Guillermo? I have explained to you about how good-looking you are, yet you refuse to believe me at all!”

“Maybe I’m good-looking _to you_ , Nandor, since you’ve been looking at this for eleven years and everything. But that doesn’t mean—”

“Take off your clothes,” Nandor commands. “Top, pants, socks, everything off. I will show you if you won’t listen.”

Guillermo groans in protest, but Nandor stares at him promptingly until he gives in. Finally, Guillermo nods and follows Nandor’s words, reaching down to the hem of his sweater. They have exchanged numerous blowjobs and handjobs since that night at the theater, even some wild, messy cuddles filled with thigh grinding, but nothing like this— in fact, Nandor doesn’t even remember if he has seen Guillermo’s nude body clearly before— he was usually so turned on that everything just turned into a spinning blur. You can’t really blame him on that.

Nandor himself is bare chested, only dressed in his thin underpants, his own cock already making a tent at the front. He watches as Guillermo strips off his sweater and shirt, his skin plush and ravishing under the warm candle light. He shifts back slightly so Guillermo can kick off his pants.

“Like it?” Guillermo blushes. He bends down to slip out of his socks, the soft pudge above his blue briefs folding into a thin line at the waistband. He is looking so incredibly delicious, bare and innocent like this.

“Yes, Guillermo, yes…” Nandor can’t help but reach out, sailing his fingertips against Guillermo’s chest like he would with a piece of fine china. Guillermo grips onto his waist with a sharp gasp, and Nandor pushes himself forward to look Guillermo in the eyes. “Good and perfect… Exactly what I want to see.”

“That sounds… a bit weird.”

“Does it?” Nandor purrs and presses down into his skin, the crooks of his thumbs brushing against Guillermo’s nipples. The human writhes underneath his hands, but he only spreads out his fingers further and squishes the soft, ample flesh into his palm. This must be what heaven feels like—if there is actually one up in the sky and not right here in Guillermo’s bedroom. “Does _this_ feel weird?”

“No—just a little,” Guillermo’s eyes flutter as he bites down a quiet whimper. “Do you like, have a _thing_ for this?”

“A thing?” Nandor hasn’t a single idea what Guillermo means, “I can satisfy you all on my own, Guillermo. No need for your human dildo doodads.” He twists his fingers around his human’s nipples and drives out a whiny, shaky breath, proving his point.

Nandor smirks. He dips down his head and sticks out his tongue, latching onto the rapidly hardening brownish pink puff against his thumb. Guillermo leans up towards him instinctively, offering himself up into the wet heat of his mouth, his fists threading into Nandor’s hair. Nandor swallows the urge to plant down his fangs—which would be wrong, he has learned, not something he should do without asking. He won’t take any risk, not tonight; for tonight it is _different_ , tonight he wishes to submit and venerate instead of taking and plundering.

“I would have someone sculpt you like this,” Nandor breaks his mouth from Guillermo’s now rosy-colored chest, “With marble, or gold, something shiny.”

“You would?” Guillermo mutters and kneads at his scalp, pupils glazed and misty.

“It shall be an honor to carve out your form, Guillermo. For any artist with two seeing eyes—for the stones too. You will be a fine muse for the humanly arts, poetries—”

“A _muse_? Really?” Guillermo chuckles, his eyes crinkled with amusement. “You can see my damn belly. I have a lot of meat on my bones, Nandor.”

“Yes you do, Guillermo.” Nandor agrees. He finds himself smiling, heart filled with joy and pride. “My champion, my honeyed peach. So beautiful. So tempting. I would have crawled over lands and oceans to land my hands on you—I would have fought an army to claim you mine.”

He leans forward and lowers his face against Guillermo’s abdomen, admiring the soft fuzz on the human’s skin. Guillermo squirms under him, but he puts down more force along Guillermo’s hips and pins him into their sheets. Nandor growls wolfishly and plants down his mouth. The warmth of Guillermo’s skin brushes against his lips, and Nandor’s thirst melts into something so delicate and ardent he almost cannot recognize.

“Hmmm,” he buries the tip of his nose in Guillermo’s stomach, and breathes in deeply. “My good Guillermo...”

He licks down, ravishing the slightly salty taste of his human. Guillermo moans out loudly, fingers weaving into Nandor’s hair, pulling him closer as he trails down a stream of wet, sloppy kisses to the edge of Guillermo’s waistband.

“Mas— Nandor—”

“Do not be shy, my Guillermo,” Nandor hums. He smooths his hands down Guillermo’s sides and onto his thick, mellowed thighs. He wrinkles the hem of his briefs with the heels of his palms, sliding his fingers inside, pleased at the breathy whimpers that come out of Guillermo. “For what you have shall be mine, and all that is mine is for you to share.”

He spreads out his palms and cups onto Guillermo’s buttocks, feeling the generous flesh on his hips wobble and spill out in between his fingers. _So perfect_ , he digs his hands into the welcoming softness, so divine, and _all his own_. Guillermo yells out in surprise. His body jerks up abruptly, thighs quivering and trapping Nandor in between his knees.

“You are to be worshipped and adored, to be lavished in fine silk and roses,” Nandor spreads Guillermo’s cheeks apart lightly, causing another choked moan to escape from his lips, “Nothing in this world you do not deserve, and I have _plenty_ to devote tonight.”

With that, he pulls down Guillermo’s final piece of garment in one swift motion, revealing the human’s swollen cock— which, just like his rich, rounded thighs, is plumped and enviously girthed. Nandor’s mouth waters. He pulls back his hand, hissing in hunger and lust. For ten years he did not claim this! How dare his human deprive him of such luscious wonder, hiding it away all to himself? What a sneaky little trickster! He should have known, seeing Guillermo saunter around the house in those lustful sweaters and jeans.

“Touch yourself,” Nandor commands.

“You are not doing it for me?” Guillermo raises his eyebrow, his face flushed pink but voice still feisty. “I thought you had much to devote.”

“Later,” Nandor grumbles. “Now stroke yourself for me, but do it slowly.”

Guillermo nods hesitantly and presses against his growing member. He bucks against the newly added friction involuntarily, lids heavy and lips parted, his shyness soon overcome by satisfaction. Following Nandor’s order, he moves up and down his own length in a dragging, torturous pace, and Nandor feels his own groin burning hotter just from the obscene look on Guillermo's features. How is it permitted, by human or vampire law, to openly mesmerize your partner in bed like this? He would tear a person in half if Guillermo asked him to, at this very moment, spread out beneath him with broken breaths. He would have done anything.

With that thought, Nandor returns to work on Guillermo’s body. He lifts up one of the quivering knees settled against his shoulder, salivating at the blood-pumped skin near the inner side of his thigh.

“May I bite you?” he asks, throat dry and burning.

“Yes, yes, please,” Guillermo struggles to find his voice, “do it, I need this—”

His tongue is against his lover’s skin before he finishes his sentence, grazing over those pale, stretched out lines mapped into his flesh. Like starlight, Nandor decides, just like those delicate shines upon an endless night sky. Again, he mouths and sucks on the delicacy before sinking down his teeth carefully, only allowing the tip of his fangs to penetrate the very surface. Still, Guillermo sobs at the sudden pain, but he does not struggle or quail, just taking it quietly with sufferance and excitement.

Nandor grips harder into the joint of his thigh and buttocks, elevating his lower body up from the bed for a better angle. He merely nibbles at first, but can’t help biting down further when the sweet, sanguine, luscious elixir rolls up his tongue and down his throat. He groans, head airy, burying the entirety of his fangs into his human while the latter lets out a set of unworldly cries. His fingers find their way to Guillermo’s entrance, circling his hole but not dipping in. When Nandor finally looks up from his feast after a wave of spasm washes over the muscles beneath his palm, he finds Guillermo rapidly moving his hand up and down, pleasuring himself to a point of indulgence. His chest and stomach shimmer with thin sweat under the candle light, like a quaint, untamed dream.

“What did I tell you, Guillermo?” Nandor catches his wrist. “Touch yourself _slowly_.”

“It’s—it’s easy for you to _say_ it,” Guillermo protests.

“So impatient. I spoiled you, didn’t I?” Nandor kisses his thigh once more, wiping off the last pearls of blood left on his skin. “Let me worship you some more, _aziz-am_. Through you I taste of life, my glorious—”

“Please, Nandor!” Guillermo struggles against his constraints, his cock throbbing for attention in front of Nandor’s face. Gasping for air, Guillermo desperately pushes himself upwards for any type of friction. “Please just touch me, let me finish—”

If it is _release_ that Guillermo desires, then it’s _release_ that he shall receive, for tonight Nandor is a servant for his beloved. He drags Guillermo towards his chest with an effortless twist of his wrist, kneeling up and folding over Guillermo’s legs with his forearms. He hovers over his startled dove, whose whole body lays out right in front of him with no mean or reason to hide, pulsing and trembling, fragile yet powerful, the vitality of a blooming flower and a racing lion. He is fixated, then overwhelmed— how fortunate he is! What else could he possibly ask of from this world, besides caressing his lover with all the fondness he can obtain?

He climbs over and takes Guillermo’s flushed cheeks into his hands, throwing himself into a kiss; the human’s warm, blossoming lips melt against his, and Nandor licks into his mouth with undiluted passion. Guillermo moans into their kiss, his heels digging into Nandor’s back and his arms around his shoulders. Nandor reaches down and starts stroking Guillermo’s leaking member, the latter now slick with pre-come. Nandor pumps fast and eagerly, his own cock hard and aching beneath his underpants, but it is Guillermo’s pleasure he has vowed to ensure.

Nandor growls and grinds down his palm with even more effort, causing Guillermo to break from their kiss with a strangled yell. His human sobs and shudders, clinging onto Nandor’s torso, his face now buried in the crook of Nandor’s neck. _Asheghetam_ , Nandor finds himself whispering, chanting, _Asheghetam, delbar-am_. He pours the honeyed words into Guillermo’s ear, as confession and prayer, again and again, even though his human would have no way to parse them. Nandor can feel the orgasm building in Guillermo’s body, his palm working relentlessly, until Guillermo sinks down his cuspids into Nandor’s neck and comes with a sobbing cry. He pours the burning seed into Nandor’s hand, limbs slipping loose and falling back against their sheets, boneless and spent. 

Guillermo lies there, eyes shuttered closed, his chest rising and falling like tides under moonlight. Nandor watches in silence, experiencing a moment of serenity despite his still-hard cock.

 _How lucky I am,_ again, he thinks to himself, bursting with pride.

“That was… something, Nandor,” Guillermo mutters under his still-trembling breath. “That was great.”

“Yes, Guillermo,” Nandor flashes him a toothy grin. “Will you be good for me as well?”

“Of course,” Guillermo says and opens his arms, lashes fluttering, meeting Nandor’s gaze with a soft yet challenging glimmer. “Come here now, tiger.”

**Author's Note:**

> Ahhh hope you liked it! Kudos and comments are super welcomed as always!!! 🥺❤️  
> my tumblr: [juicejuicebaby](https://juicejuicebaby.tumblr.com)  
> (yes the title is from that one Anna Phoebe Lou song)


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